News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!  News Flash!

February 24, 2002

    Welcome to the second issue of the News Flash.  It's been an interesting week and I've heard a lot of good things about the newsletter.  I hope you won't hesitate to send me your comments or questions.  The contest to name the newsletter is still on, although I haven't gotten any suggestions to date.  Perhaps we have a keeper with the News Flash name.  

    Anyways, there seems to be a lot of new things to talk about, check out our new column... Dear Jaffo, I'm sure you'll find it interesting and humorous.

Ann Johnson
Captain Ann Johnson


Rear Admiral Vicky Howe
Commander in Chief, ASG for AOL members


Sim Schedule

"There is a multi-legged creature crawling on your shoulder."
... Spock, "A Taste of Armageddon," stardate 3193.9..


The other B5 sim, the BFA Freedom sims on Wednesday nights at 9:15 Eastern and who knows what'll happen there. One minute you might be on patrol and the next you could end up in a fire fight with any or every race in the known galaxy...especially the Centauri.  Come join Captain Solr as he leads this merry crew on a wild chase through the B5 universe.


Dear Jaffo,
Hi, I read your debut article and I have to say I was quite smitten. You're SO spiffy! But back to my question.. Why do my socks have holes in them? You seem like quite an expert on all things socks, so I figured you were the one to ask.

Clueless About Socks

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Dear CAS,

Thank you for the compliments and praise. Unfortunately I can't take quite all of the credit for my knowledge on socks, as I trained under K'ung Tzu Biscuit, the current Zen Master of Socks in Tibet. The reason, as K'ung Tzu Biscuit explained it to me, that socks have holes in them, is this: late at night while you're sleeping, tiny aggravated WOIDs (that's, Worms Of Immense Destruction) scurry out of the walls and ceilings. Being their normal anarchistic selves, they immediately begin wreaking havoc in your room. You'll notice very obvious and common signs of their having been in your room, such as messed up hair, horrible breath, and a general feeling of having to pee in the morning. The one thing that drives WOIDs to total carnage is clean, wholesome socks. They simply cannot fathom such a truly wonderful and spiffy thing, and they go insane with rage and take out all their anger in horrific attacks on your socks. Being that WOIDs are so tiny, they naturally cannot accomplish much damage. But still, every night your socks' lifespans are whittled away by the fury of the WOIDs. So says K'ung Tzu Biscuit.



Sim Design and Development

It is the dreams, ideas, and energy of the simmers that create a sim. The SDD is dedicated to morphing those ideas into the fun filled environment that is envisioned. Acting as a springboard, beta-testers, or just a generator for ideas, the SDD will do everything in its power to make the ideas come to life. Or so says the mission statement. 

The SDD is involved in more than just creating sims or plotlines, we are interested in making the group better. We love to answer questions for people who have them, whether it be about technology, ASG operations, or how it is possible for little white rabbits to wear mithril armor and fire suppressant systems. We host ourselves in the ASG Holodeck and keep the place going. If you ever feel bored and want something to entertain you, drop by and help us solve the mystery of why there are no toilets in Star Trek.


Star Wars... You find yourself walking into a cantina filled with strange aliens, gun runners, freighter captains, dancing girls and music that makes your feet tap.  Sitting down at the bar you overhear a story being told about the bravery and skill of those aboard a great ship called "The Avenger".  Brave men and women, led by Commander Zach Rodchester tour the universe fighting evil and the dark side. This Imperial ship leads the fight in tracking down the Empire's evilest villains and fiercest ships.  As you listen more and more you feel your adrenaline build until you stand up and throw your hand in deciding to join up with this brave crew as they take out the Empire's fleet piece by piece.  Are you up to the challenge?  Find out by attending the Avenger next Saturday night at 9:15 eastern.



The Membership part of the ASG Website includes the Membership application, an area to join the mailing list and other features that might come in handy for you some day.  Have a friend looking for a group or sim to join?  Have them check out the sim schedule at: or just send them to the join page at:


Star Trek Intelligence -- Star Trek starships and technology database

STARTREK.COM:Medical & Science Library







Previous Issue:   Feb 17, 2002